The concept of a Fertile Mindset grew out of my 20+ years of fertility support. And it has now come to mean so much more, both for those on a fertility journey and also anyone who has a dream, goal or plan for their life. If you want to live a life with meaning and achieve great things (whatever that means to you), you are in the right place. Do read on so we can get to know each other, then feel free to contact me to tell me a bit about you and the kind of support you’re looking for.
The story of my journey to Fertile Mindset began in 1999 when I was in a mind-numbing call centre job answering an average of just ten minute-long calls each day. The internet was new and exciting so I spent the 7 hours and 50 minutes of free time online both planning my upcoming wedding and researching what else I could do other than this tedious job.
I had loved Reflexology for a long time since it resolved severe IBS symptoms in my teens, so I signed up to Reflexology Practitioner training to start as soon as we returned from our honeymoon. There began my journey into therapies and self development, and I loved every second of it!
As soon as I opened my clinic doors I was inundated with fertility and pregnancy clients. I had a lot to learn and immersed myself in research and additional training. Before long I was considered the go-to person locally for Fertility Reflexology, and I would later train hundreds of Reflexologists in the UK and Ireland in the specialism through my Fertility Reflexology Network.
Much as I loved Reflexology and saw wonderful results for my fertility clients, I felt lacking in how to support them emotionally. It was clear that, for many, the emotional aspects of their fertility journey were the most challenging, and there seemed to be little appropriate support available. Then in 2003 I was introduced to a technique called EFT by a newly qualified practitioner who was looking for ‘case studies’. EFT – Emotional Freedom Techniques, also called ‘Tapping’ – is a remarkable technique that brings balance to thoughts, emotions and beliefs by tapping on specific acupressure points on the face, hands and upper body.
I volunteered myself, although I was highly sceptical (how could tapping on points on my face and hands help with emotions?!) and said that I wanted to work on my fear of public speaking. Within the first session I could tell the fear was gone and I was eager to test out my new confidence by chairing a meeting for my local Reflexologist Support Group. Since then I have enjoyed speaking at events all over the world and I even passed the ultimate test of a live TV appearance on BBC News (which I couldn’t believe I actually enjoyed!).
After qualifying as an EFT practitioner, and working on my own fears and anxieties, I felt drawn to look at whether I wanted to have a baby. Despite working with fertility and pregnancy, I had never wanted to have children myself because I had an intense phobia of pregnancy and childbirth. The fears were deeply rooted in my mother’s traumatic experience of giving birth to me which were so shocking to me as a child that I promised myself I would never have a baby and put myself ‘at risk’.
With my newly learned EFT skills it was if a door had opened to the possibility of becoming a mother. With curiosity, I spent a couple of hours one sunny June day sitting in my garden tapping through the emotions and beliefs I had around pregnancy and birth. I emerged from that intense tapping session with a certainty that I did want to have a baby. And I wanted it NOW! After sharing this surprising news with my husband (who fortunately felt the same), we began a 9 year journey through fertility challenges that affected us both. My years of fertility knowledge were very useful indeed!
Our first baby was born after both natural and medicated fertility treatment. And our second baby came to us 5 years later through adoption. Travelling a path that included making decisions about fertility testing and treatment, and then deciding whether to stop trying and instead pursue adoption, gave me real-life insights into the experience of my fertility clients. Although I was a knowledgeable and experienced fertility practitioner before, my own lived experience of both fertility treatment and adoption deepened my understanding and empathy immeasurably.
My third baby will always be my Fertile Mindset business (oh, and my tortoise and two cats!), and Fertile Mindset was born out of my belief that we all have amazing, resilient and creative minds. Challenges such as fertility issues, trauma and loss can instil fears and worries that hold us back and stop us connecting with what we are truly capable of. A ‘Fertile Mindset’ is something that I believe we can all benefit from, and we all have within us. And EFT Tapping can quite literally help us tap into all our potential!
You are reading this soon after I made the transition from fertility support into a wider concept of what it means to have a Fertile Mindset and how it can help us live a life that we love, whether that is through creating a family, a business, a home, a relationship, friendship, writing a book, or whatever you know that you are meant for in this lifetime. Fertile Mindset is growing into this new space, and more offerings are on the horizon. You can see all the ways to work with me here.
It’s my wish for you that you will dream bigger than you’ve ever done before, be open to all possibilities, and live and love your life fully!
Some more things about me that are both fun and will help you decide if I’m the right person to have in your support team:
- My lived experiences include growing up with an absent father, navigating a 9 year fertility and adoption journey, and creating my dream business that gives me security, freedom and a life with purpose.
- I’m a parent to two neurodivergent children, and also recognise ND traits throughout my family and in myself. I am always up-levelling my learning and understanding of neurodivergence, disability and the lived experience of all marginalised groups.
- I am a LGBTQIA+ ally and Fertile Mindset is a LGBTQIA+ friendly business.
- I’ve been vegetarian since childhood and vegan since 2018, and understand the unique emotional challenges of living in a non-vegan world.
- When I’m not working, my favourite things to do are taking long walks, reading all kinds of books (or more often listening through Audible – often on those walks!), seeking out the best vegan food (or cooking it myself), spending time in my beloved second home on the Isle of Cumbrae, travelling to new places, London (all of it – I’m lucky to live so close), and being a fan since 1990 of boyband phenomenon New Kids on the Block (yes they are still together, yes if there’s an upcoming show I do have tickets, and yes I do have a fave ‘Kid’ – Donnie!)
Now, I’d love to hear from you. Send me a message to ask me any questions or to chat about how I could support you in creating your own amazing Fertile Mindset!
